MISSION
STATEMENT: To encourage others in their struggles with life and walking with
the Lord, by sharing her thoughts and spiritual insights in her songs.
The
messages of hope and encouragement were inspired by her own real life heartaches
and happiness she experienced as a person experiencing her early twenties.
Themes
Expressed in her Music:
The Lord grows us through
the hard times in our lives and the hard times of others in our lives. Trials
such as loss, desperation, divorce and wanting to be loved again are powerful
motivations for personal evolvement and growth.
The Lord never leaves us, and we can depend on Him to see us through anything.
God
loves you as you are. One important goal is to find
own identity. Be secure in who you are, not what other's say. The Lord has made us to serve Him in unique ways.
Review
of Kendall Payne's CD, GROWN
Kendall Payne
describes her music, "I don't like classifying my music as pop or alternative
or whatever it might be called. To me, it's like a stew of different thoughts,
emotions, and feelings."
This newest musical
stew of Kendall Payne's different thoughts, emotions, insights and feelings is
a delightful collection of well-played acoustic-based songs which this reviewer
classifies as being sort of a lyrical diary of her hard process of redefining
herself, and refocusing her sense of purpose for her gifts, as she goes down a
new unfamiliar road. For the CD's title, GROWN is
the perfect description of the end result of Kendall
Payne's transition and evolvement during this dark time in her life as the Lord
patiently molded and grew her, leading her through the dark hallway into a much
better life for her to create her music, with her faith and love for the Lord
intact. Kendall Payne is faithful in sharing what she learned over the last four
years with the listening audience, offering this collection of songs which are
a blessing and an encouragement to the listener.
Album
begins on a solemn note with a song, SCRATCH about beginning again with the Lord
and people who listen to her music - Her fans and others who have yet to hear
her songs. Songs reflects on being a grown-up girl, facing hard times, worries,
confusion, wondering how she will start over again with the Lord and her fans.
The second song, ROLLERCOASTER in contrast
is a lively keep you chin up acoustic guitar propelled melody, with a memorable
chorus putting a positive spin in a musical and lyrical way on life in general
- accepting both the hills and valleys we experience.
She
continues along this train of thought in SUPERSTAR, exploring why change is good
for our soul, especially when it comes to our natural tendency of being all about
self, and the temptation of reaching for empty goals. But we can't change without
help from the Holy Spirit, via other people, and life's experiences.
She
visits painful situations which are part of our human condition, such as mental
illness in JOHNNY SHOT TO THE MOON caused by emotional stress, and the heartbreak
of a marital split, HAPPY, due to selfish attitudes evolving around personal happiness.
She follows up with her conclusion about pain caused by personal relationships
in the song, UPS and DOWNS.
She explores another
hard thing to do; being selfless, putting self second to others in the song, MOON. When a person finds themselves in a difficult valley,
her solution can be found in BACKWARDS, another song of encouragement.
The
song ASLAN explore the characteristics of Jesus via a song about the ASLAN lion
from the book, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.
The
Album ends with a song, PRAY, which asks for things which will keep one humble,
loving toward others and will develop personal character and holiness pleasing
to the Lord.
While the lyrical messages, the
melodies which they are paired with and the vocals which express them are the
true stars of the songs, the acoustical arrangements are brilliantly put together
as well, offering acoustic and light rock selections, always interesting, never
mundane! Kendall Payne and friends have created
songs with solid musical arrangements to support the main melodies, perfect for
each song's lyrical message.
WOW! What
an album. Let's review why! Inspired musical compositions which are well played,
a pleurae of insightful meaningful 'real' lyrics, and Kendall Payne's wonderful
vocals make GROWN a must for anyone's music collection. For
all ages of listeners are blessed by what Kendall Payne has learned through her
times of trial about herself and about the Lord.
SPIRITUAL
TRUTHS / THEMES - Found in her songs on GROWN
The
Lord grows us through the hard times in our lives and the hard times of others
in our lives: SCRATCH * ROLLERCOASTER * MOON * JOHNNY * PRAY
Trials
such as loss, desperation, divorce and wanting to be loved again are powerful
motivations for personal evolvement and growth, as our needs draw us to God: HAPPY
* BACKWARDS * STAND HERE
The Lord never leaves
us, and we can depend on Him to see us through, by His way and time, not necessarily
our way or time table, because of who He is: UPS
& DOWNS * STAND HERE * BACKWARDS * ASLAN
God
loves you as you are, and puts people in your life to give you support. LITTLE
THINGS
One important goal is to find own identity.
Be secure in who you are, not what other's say. The Lord has made us to serve
Him in unique ways. SUPERSTAR * LITTLE THINGS * TWENTY THREE
GROWN
Songs - Individual Commentary and Lyrics
*
* * + + SCRATCH - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
This
song, SCRATCH was selected for an episode of the TV show drama, GREY'S ANATOMY.
Strong
favorite of this reviewer. Begins with a lovely intro
featuring a string ensemble, then segues into a acoustic guitar based ballad /
prayer hymn with a background cello or two. Great use of dynamics in both the
expressive vocals and moving musical composition. Melody is haunting, perfect
for the opening lyrical message, which expresses Kendall's insights on the challenges
of starting over on a new, unfamiliar road, not traveled on before, with just
the Lord to lean on, trusting in Him to be able to step out in faith, not knowing
how her music will be received.
Scriptural
References: (Psalm 119:105, Jer. 29:11-13, Phil. 2:13)
Lyrics
Its
a big girl world now. Full of big girl things. And every day I wish I was small
/ I've been counting on nothing / But He keeps giving
me His Word / And I am tired of hearing myself speak.
Do
you get weary? Do you ever get weak? How do you dream when you can't fall asleep?
I've
been wondering what you're thinking And if you liked my dress tonight. Would you
still say you loved me Under this ordinary moonlight / I'm
so afraid of what you'll say.
Chorus: I'd
like to know if you'd be open / to starting over from scratch / I'd
like to know if you'd be open / To giving me a second chance
I used to think I was special / And only I have proved me wrong / I thought I
could change the world with a song / But I have
ended up in India / With no map to guide me home / The strangest place I think
/ I've ever been
Bridge:And all this time
/ I thought that we were friends / But my stubborn will is learning to bend
Chorus:
*
* * + + ROLLERCOASTER - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
Second favorite song of this reviewer. Thanks to the enthusiastic guitar ensemble
which crisply establish both the rhythm & melody support and dynamic soft
to energetic vocals, this song presses home the hopeful lyrical message, which
truly does remind one of being on a ROLLERCOASTER. Lyrically, she compares experiencing
the ups and the downs of life as just like being on a rollercoaster, adding her
thoughts and insights, which the listener can relate to very well. Most enjoyable
dynamic buildup, which is at full throttle during the chorus.
Scriptural
References: (2nd Cor. 4:16-18, Psalm 27:14, Ephes. 4:2-3)
Lyrics
Life
gets a little better life stays a little gray. Live it up, live it long you can
always count on. Those unexpected moments when the pleasure just Sweeps you away
We were made for something better / Something
better than this inconsistency / So while you wait to respond to what's really
going on / Under shame, under doubt /what the whole thing's all about / Sing to
me
Chorus: It's like a rollercoaster 100 miles
fast / Spins you round in circles till you want to collapse / Makes you so excited
you can't wait for your second chance
Love
gets a little moldy / Especially when its you I'm trying to love / And the road
gets so long seems so hard to sing along / But I can't ever imagine any other
/ I would rather be dreaming of
We are riding
on the shoulders / Of the ones who've come before and the ones who've passed away
Some are good / some are bad / some are all we've ever had / To compare to prepare
us for everything we're facing today.
Chorus
VAMP:
Some are good / Some are bad / Some are all we've ever had / Some are tired some
are bored / Some still stuck on keeping score / Some are kind / Some are mean
/ Some are never to be seen Some are tired / some are weak / some are lying through
their teeth / Some can love / some can hate / I can relate.
Chorus
*
* * + SUPERSTAR - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
Nicely
composed acoustic light rock anthem / written in a minor key, which has a catchy
rhythm and melody, in an easy 4 rock beat using a snare drum. Dotted note rhythmic
melody gives the song a swing feel, which is carried very nicely in the vocals,
done so well by Kendall. Usual great dynamics and heartfelt delivery of lyrical
message.
Scriptural References: ( Romans 12:2,
1 John 2:15-16, Matt. 6:33, Luke 12:34, Gal. 5:19-26)
Lyrics
Look
at all those lives / living for themselves / Look at all you've got / that you
could give to someone else yeah / Look at all you've done / With all the days
you've had so far / What you will become / Is up to you to search your heart
Bridge:
But nothing ever changes / You see so many faces / No, nothing ever changes /
until someone changes you
Chorus 1: Who do
you think you are? Who do you think you are? Some kind of superstar?
Look
at all your time wasted on what fades away / Would you take it back /if you could
have your yesterdays
Bridge: But nothing ever
changes / You see so many faces / No, nothing ever changes / until someone changes
you
Chorus 2: Who do you think you are? Who
do you think you are? Some kind of superstar? (When you see the world in need
/ who do you want to be? / You can be who you want to be) Who do you think you
are? Who do you think you are? Some kind of superstar?
Hook:
When all this is over maybe we'll see / Who we were made for and destined to be,
but tell me...
Tag: Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are? Some kind of superstar? Who
do you think you are? Some kind of superstar? Who do you think you, Who do you
think you are?
* * * + + UPS & DOWNS - Words
and Music by Kendall Payne
A lovely, hopeful,
upbeat acoustic anthem with nice inner voices contributions from flute, keys,
concertina, and perhaps a mandolin, all which support the main melody or provide
really pretty counter melody! Love the vocals and lyrical message encouraging
us to coming to peace with the darkness in us, so that our true light inside can
shine!
Scriptural References: (Phil.4:6-8,
Romans 15:13, John 8:12, Joshua 1:9, Matt. 11:28-30)
Lyrics
All
that I've found through the ups and the downs / Is that I'd have it no other way
/ Life in the raw is both fragile and strong / Its both lovely and ugly the same
/ Who can attest that when they're at their best / Oh their worst is still crouching
close behind / Its coming to peace with the darkness in me / That allows the true
light inside to shine
Chorus: So let it go
for we are still far from home / Though your try and you try to escape /To live
and to love will always be dangerous / But it's better than playing it safe
We
are composed of a symphony of notes / Every life is as music to His ears / I'll
play my melody be it haunting be it sweet / Unashamed of what anyone might hear.
So
when the load breaks your back and your will / You must still keep your heart
in the game / To live and to love will always be dangerous / But it's better than
playing it safe.
So let it go when it don't
feel like home / When inside is your only escape / To live and to love will always
be dangerous / But would you want it any other way?
*
* * + + THE MOON - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
A
strong favorite of the reviewer. A beautiful, 3/4 meter, piano ballad with acoustic
guitar as a support voice. A metaphorical song using the moon to stand for a person
who despite personal pain or hardship puts others first. A tender, poignant song
which flows along right over the listener.
Scriptural
References: (1st Cor. 10:24, 2nd Cor.4:8-10, Ruth 1:15-16, Ephes. 5:1)
Lyrics
The
moon's worn thin / Succumbed to the pressure / Her silver dress / Hangs in the
sky like a rag
Her coat her cloak / Her cover
of darkness / It fails to hide / The tears that she's cried / Oh she cries
Chorus:
But she still shines / Though the night falls around her /And by her light I find
my way / When I fear the path laid before me / I look to the light of her face
/ And thank her for being so brave.
The moon
remains / In fullness or frailty / A faithful climb / And I stand amazed at the
way
Chorus:
*
* * + + STAND HERE - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
An
inspiring acoustic pop ballad / prayer hymn, making great use of both acoustical
and electric guitars. Begins with a solemn electrical guitar playing an acoustic
part in intro segues into an upbeat electrical guitar ensemble. Quiets down during
verses, for the quiet poignant vocals, melody being carried by acoustic guitars,
but builds once again to and through the chorus.
Scriptural
References: (Psalm 37:7 & 46:10, 1 Chron.16:11, Romans 8:31)
Lyrics
I
am still waiting. For how long I don’t know. It’s a long way back from where I’ve
been / But there’s no where else to go
Chorus:
So I’ll stand With my face to the wind / And my back to the world / I’ll follow
You / And I’ll go where You tell me to go./ No I
won’t be afraid ;/ No I won’t be afraid.
I
feel your wind is moving. I’m not sure where its going / But
I’ll let it carry me away / Cause I’m not staying in this place.
Chorus:
Bridge: And I won’t turn around! And I won’t turn around! And I won’t turn around!
How could I? And I won’t turn around!
I am
still waiting. For how long I don’t know. It’s a long way back from where I’ve
come / But there’s no where else to go
Chorus
Tag:
So I’ll stand With my face to the wind And my back to the world I’ll follow you
* * * + LITTLE THINGS - Words and Music by
Kendall Payne
Light acoustic pop ballad with
a catchy, quick two beat, dotted note rhythm melody which provides the perfect
musical support for this lyrical message about becoming the person the Lord has
made us to be.
Scriptural References: (Ephes.
2:10, Matt. 11:28-30, Phil 3:12-14)
Lyrics
I
don’t care what anybody thinks. I will stare when everybody blinks. I don’t mind
the difference that they see
Cause He loves
Every little thing / Every little thing / Every little
thing / Every little thing / Every little thing, About me…
I
believe that everybody bleeds / Sticks and stones aren’t what has cut so deep
/ I won’t buy the hate they sell for free /
Chorus:
Bridge:
You can’t carry the weight of the world / I won’t carry the weight of the world
I can tell the hell that you’ve been through. / It won’t make a difference what
we do / They’ll still tell you all the lies are true
But I love Every little thing / Every little thing / Every little thing Every
little thing / About you / / Every little thing About you… Every little thing
Every little thing Every little thing Every little thing Every little thing About
you…
* * * + + HAPPY - Words and Music by
Kendall Payne
Third favorite song of this reviewer.
Easy two beat (carried by light snare drum) country acoustic ballad, which has
a light, breezy melody supported by keyboard chords and acoustic guitars, with
very light, delicate electric guitar counter melody in parts, starting in 2nd
verse. Great contrast in vocal style used in verses and chorus. Kendall begins
the verses in a softer, quieter style, which builds in emotion by the section
of each verse which begins with // Take, building into the chorus. Very nice harmonies
as well!
Scriptural References: (1 Cor. 13,
Ephesians 4: 2b -3, 32 & 5:22-30)
Lyrics
I can’t sleep its Sunday morning / I get no peace when your away /I thought the
stars were finally for us / I read ‘em wrong they’re brewing hurricanes / / Take these arms we call our
home / And feel just what is true / The sky ain’t moving me away / it’s the sky
that’s moving you.
I can’t breath it’s all
too sudden / You made your move and by surprise / I’ve been caught again in danger
/ Divorce myself to be your bride / / Take these
words of right and wrong / And tell me how they fit?/ When I’m am wrong for loving
me / And you’re right I just can’t quit
Chorus:
I wanna be free to be happy again / I want be told that you love who I am / And
if it’s a spark that you’re missing, Well, maybe you should try and hold my hand
/ I wanna be happy / again!.
I can’t choose
between now and never / Our baby boy he’s almost five / And he needs both his
momma and daddy / And I won’t make him choose a side // Take
these roads we travel on / And tell me where they lead? /You sold me heaven /
but you gave me hell / And with every step I bleed
Chorus:
I wanna be happy again. I wanna be happy again. I wanna be happy again.
*
* * JOHNNY - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
A
driving rock ballad, with a well put together composition with a strong electric
guitar ensemble full of precise playing, interesting rhythms and striking vocals.
Scriptural
References: (1 Peter 5:7, Romans 14:19 & 15:1-2,14)
Lyrics
Johnny shot to the moon. It’s on the nightly news. There’s nothing I can do. Johnny
shot to the moon
Johnny’s got (3x) something
to say Johnny’s not (2x) he’s not coming down today / Johnny thought (2x) things
would always be the same /Oh no, no, no things can’t always be the same
Johnny
shot through the roof No one can get through Come and see the proof That Johnny
shot through the roof
When you wake up in a
war. Torn between your heart and head. Who will win / who’ll be defeated? Johnny
I quit keeping score. Now there’s no-one left to blame. No-one left to leave you
cheated
Johnny shot to the moon / I guess it’s
nothing new / It’s sad to say but its true That Johnny shot to the moon
*
* * + + BACKWARDS - Words and Music by Kendall Payne and Jason Wade (Bridge &
Chorus)
Light rock anthem with a strong melody
to go with the effective lyrics which pump one up not to give up but step out
in faith. Again great use of electric guitar ensemble, in a solid acoustic rock
composition, providing the perfect upbeat musical vehicle for the hopeful, positive
vocals which clearly express the lyrical message with umph.
Scriptural
References: (Joshua 1:9, Heb. 12:1-3, Romans 5;1-5, Phil 3:12-14)
Lyrics
You
can’t go backwards you must go forward / You have not been what you could be /
When you are the only one who enslaves you / Then you’re the only one who can
set you free.
Chorus: Don’t run away, question
the answers / Live your life like it’s on fire / You’re one mistake is to think
that you’ve made one / Don’t run away
You
can’t have mountains without the valleys / You can’t go high if you won’t go deep
/ You can’t do over / what you’ve done already / Expecting something new to see
Chorus:
Bridge:
I will not be bought, will not be caged Won’t stay behind my walls where it is
safe/ No I’m tired of trying to compensate for you / For you…
Chorus:
*
* * + + ASLAN - Words and Music by Kendall Payne
(A
song inspired by the C.S. Lewis book, The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.)
Fourth
favorite song of this reviewer. A light, bouncy, easy four beat ballad with a
delightful melody, bright vocals propelled by a very melodic ensemble of acoustic
guitar and a concertina. Vocals are most enjoyable, with nice back up vocal harmonies,
2nd and 3rd time through the chorus.
Scriptural
References: (Isaiah 55:8, Ephes.2: 4-9, John 3:16 & 7:37-38, Romans 6:33)
Lyrics:
Don’t
stop your crying on my account. A frightening lion, no doubt. He’s not safe no,
he’s not safe Are you tempted now to run away? The King above all kings is coming
down.
Chorus: But He won’t say the words /
you wish that he would / Oh He don’t do / the deeds / you know that He could /
He won’t think the thoughts / you think that he should / But He is good, He is
good.
I know you’re thirsty/ the water is free
/ But I should warn you- it’ costs everything / Well, he’s not fair no, he’s not
fair When he fixes what’s beyond repair And graces everyone that don’t deserve
No-one
knows him whom eyes never seen No, I don’t know Him but He knows me / He knows
me. He knows me.
Lay down your layers, shed
off your skin But without his incision you can’t enter in / He cuts deep, yeah
he cuts deep When the risk is great and the talk is cheap But never leaves a wounded
one behind.
Chorus:
*
* * + + TWENTY THREE
A song about hurting,
taking a chance and letting go, in the hard process of growing up. Beautiful 3/4
meter, poignant ballad composed in a minor key, featuring a perfect pairing of
heartfelt lyrics and a haunting melody, brought to life by moving electrical &
acoustical guitar, light synths and strings in an inspiring musical composition
with great dynamics and variety. Kendall's vocals touch the soul, bringing the
song to life, all the pain and the hope which struggle within, during a hard time.
Song chokes up this reviewer every time!
Scriptural
References: (Psalm 37:1-8, 28, Matt. 6:33, Phil 4:6-8, Romans 5;1-5)
Lyrics
Twenty
three when did we become grown? I never noticed the seeds of the cynic being sown
/ Will we starve will the harvest time reap / Freedom or chains hope or disdain
for the weak?
Twenty three when did we become
safe? We pray to feel pleasure / and hate when we have to feel pain.
Chorus
1 : Let me see / your burn / let me see your bruise / You look just like me /
Let me see / where you’re broken in two.
We
pretend when we / find the end of ourselves / Afraid to be real so we say that
we’re somebody else / Little ones / teach the big to be free / Children are only
un-costumed humanity
Chorus 2: While we wait
here in the dark / love lends a spark / But we can’t decide / ‘Cause coming back
to life / is harder than hell / Once you have died.
Finally
I can see with your eyes / That everyone angry is only just aching inside / Twenty-three
/ when the sun sets tonight / There’s always a reason we just cannot leave it
behind.
* * * + + PRAY
Favorite
song of this reviewer. Lyrics are excellent, as Kendall sums it up insightfully,
sharing what she has learned from the bumps in her road, how she has been blessed.
Well-crafted and well composed; simple yet lovely and interesting - perfect for
a prayer hymn, welcome in any contemporary service / denomination! Main melody
and poignant vocals supported with lovely, smooth broken chords played by guitar
during the first two verses, and verses 3 & 4. A string ensemble enters in
at the Chorus Refrain; Both supporting the guitar and offering a very nice counter
melody during both Chorus Refrains.
Scriptural
References: ( Jer. 29:11-16, 1 Peter 15:16, Ephes. 4:1)
Lyrics
I
will pray for you now for you have been my faithful friends / While the road we
walk is difficult indeed / I couldn’t not ask for more than what you’ve already
been / Only that you would say these prayers for me.
May
your heart break enough that compassion enters in / May your strength all be spent
upon the weak /All the castles and crowns you build and place upon your head /
May they all fall come crashing down around your feet.
May
you find every step to be harder than the last / So your character grows greater
each stride / May your company be of humble insignificance / May your weakness
be your only source of pride
Chorus Refrain
1: What you do unto others may it all be done to you / May you meet the one who
made us / And see him smile when life is through. (String Interlude)
Chorus
Refrain 2: May your blessings be many but not what you hoped they’d be / And when
you look upon the broken / May mercy show you what you could not see.
May
you never be sure of any plans you desire / But you’d learn to trust the plan
he has for you / May your passions be tried and tested in the holy fire / May
you fight with all your life for what is true.
I
have prayed for you now all of my dear and faithful friends / But what I wish
is more than I could ever speak / As the way wanders on I’ll long to see you once
again / Until then, would you pray these prayers for me? / Oh that you would pray
for me.
Listen
to her music * Buy her
CD, GROWN
Kendall Payne's Video
Reviewed by Julie Carr for ChristianMusic.com
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